Back to Life....

I admit it's been an unreasonable time since my last entry. I have made some huge life changes--all good. I quit my full-time attorney job, set up my own firm where I'm trying to work part time. (More difficult than you think.) I am also singing more and teaching voice. Starting to write again, preparing a voice-over demo and getting my nerve to create some visual art. With my soccer player 14 year old and my 11 year old bass player, I am as busy as I ever was, but I like it better. Enough of the days of Dena.

Find your peace now, don't wait
My changes have made me realize that life is passing by and most of us are watching it just speed by us. Do we really enjoy the things we do? Do we live in the moment? Or do we continually chase the dollar or think we'll be happy and peaceful when we have that bigger house, pay off your most hated creditor, or lose the weight that has been piling on our hips over the years? I myself am the most culpabe of this dysfunctionality. I say we stop now and decide I AM GOING TO MAKE THIS MY DAY!!!!! I think it's time to honestly ask ourselves if we are living the life we really want. If your true answer is "yes" - Congratulations! You've found it. If your answer is no, it's probably not a good idea to make a list of everything you hate (I've done that, and believe me, it only makes you so depressed you call your psychiatrist and double your dosage of Lexapro). Instead, ask youself: what' the big thing? It may be as simple as getting the management of your day under control or getting up an extra 30 minutes to sqeeze in that workout. It may not be so simple--requiring some self-reflection (as it did me). The decision to live your life now and stop waiting I think is difficult for women because we always put ourselves last in family and at work. But realize we are literally making everyone around us miserable with our refusal to participate in life now or with our short-tempered nature. When we take an honest inventory right now -- things are pretty good (not great -- that rarely happens), and pretty likeable. Love what you have. Try do think this way for just one day -- don't give in to the driving urge to work towards happiness -- just be satisfied and at peace. Go forth and find your Zen....

Books:
At the recommendation of Ann L and after reading Agnes and the Hitman, I picked up more Jennifer Crusie novels. I'm reading Fast Women at the moment. It's spiked with such great personalities. I love that the characters seem to live normal existences, yet that have the most interesting outlooks on life and are often caught in the strangest (albeit seemingly natural) situations. Her heroines are bright and zany and do not ever have those vomit-inducing chips on their shoulders or helpless routines going on that so many romance authors seem to think we want. Give me the interesting, quirky, laugh out loud, but never stupid women I love and would want to be friends with. I also found another great read -- Fifty Ways to Hex Your Lover by Linda Wisdom. (Paranormal romance) Wisdom put just the right amount of fun, sex, witty reparte and craziness into this book to make it a fun read, but did not venture into ridiculous. (I know my MIL will say everything I read is ridiculous, but she's not found her "today happiness" like I have.) Just bought the sequel to 50 Ways -- will let you know if Wisdom continues to work her magic.

I received a Sony eReader for Christmas. OMG!!!!!!! It's the greatest thing that ever has entered my life (well, that and "sit up in bed" chair from Brookstone that I also received just make me a happy peach). I have downloaded 100 or so electronic books on my reader. It fits in my purse and I just read whatever I feel like reading. Girls, run and get this---be it a Kindle, eReader, whatever. It's amazing. Oh sure, I like the hard paper just as much as everyone else and still have 50+ books in my bookcase waiting to be cracked open (and believe me, they will be); but you simply cannot beat the amazing convenience of having this little thing with a screen that spits out all your books. DH ("Darling Husband") loves it because I've been known to read ebooks on my computer into the wee hours of the morning. So now I just have a booklight and my eReader. Much less grumbling is occurring--at least about that. I think it's the wave of the future.

Movies
During the holidays, I saw the new James Bond movie - Quantum of Solace. I appreciate what they were doing with this revenge thing, but it didn't grab me or work for me. Nonetheless, Daniel Craig still does it for me......perhaps we just turn off the volume and watch. I also decided to watch all the Transporter movies during the holidays. I must say Jason Statham is one I'll be watching forever also. After my marathon of Transporter, I rented The Bank Job and was equally impressed with not only the good lookingness of Statham, but also the plot and acting. He's definitely an alpha male. Mmmmm. DH saw Slumdog Millionare and said it was one of the best movies he's seen in a long time. Of course, he loved Napoleon Dynamite and Office Space, so his opinions are questionable. He loves the awkward dynamic in movies and TV shows. I just keep thinking -- I would never want to be around those people so why would I pay money to watch them on a gigantic screen. Also, now that Slumdog is now up for an Oscar, it will receive the wretched hype that I hate in my special favorite movie group. It's such a sham when good movies find enormous success! My movie watching has been sad due to my departure from my lawfirm and a general desire to not leave my house lately. I'm back in the saddle and will be much better about finding those great secret, non-hyped movies that we all love.

Music
Currently listening to an amazing young but soulful voice, ADELE. Her lastest CD is "19". Melting my Heart to Stone and Chasing Pavements are my current favs from that CD. Seal's newest "Soul" is simply amazing. Just listen to it leaning back with your eyes closed. He literally enters your body and fills your soul. For those of you who are like me and love to hear the great old standards being sung by amazing voices -- give Nicole Henry an try. She's got a clear and pure voice, but her interpretation gives the songs such a sultry, smoky feeling. My favs are "Make it last" and "The Very Thought of You." Also I listen to Jenny Scheinman's "Twilight Time" every morning (singing along at the top of my lungs). Give her a listen. Finally, I found Marie Digby on YouTube and was completely enchanted by her. I think she's made her way to iTunes -- Check her out. - I love "Spell" She's on iTunes now. She's on her way to greatness. Her wonderful lyics are well-matched to natural melodies. Others that are notworthy, Jon MacLaughlin's Indiana and Matt Belsante's Blame it on my Youth. Interested in your thoughts on these folks. Listen happily. My DS (Darling Son) is demanding that I remind you that Linkin Park is, in his opinion, the most amazing band ever formed and seems to identify with his complicated inner nature. Listen at your own peril.

So, read, listen to music, watch movies, breathe and be happy with your now.